I'm a Grade A Scaredy Cat.

There's a big difference between someone being a "dreamer" and someone being a "do-er." I've always liked to imagine myself as a do-er, but the problem is, I'm really not. I tend to fall into the trap of self-doubt a lot more than I'd like to admit. Sometimes, I'm convinced I can conquer the world, but then there's always the reminder that I'm not the best, the brightest, or the whatever-est out there.

My issues of self-doubting stem from a long-time conflict that exists between my mother and I, but this isn't the time or place to address that. That's what therapy is for, right? Anyway, I'm pretty sure I'll never fully learn to believe in myself. With the constant fear of rejection suffocating me out of simple things like asking for a job application, I can hardly picture myself living out every single one of the dreams I've got locked away in this head of mine.

Maybe, just maybe, someone will take a chance on me. I'll wind up as the wedding planner I've always wanted to be, as the mother to a few gorgeous babies, or as the flight attendant on the international flight to Italy who gets to spend half her life living in Rome and the other half in the Big Apple. Or maybe, no one will take a chance on the girl who thinks she's not worth chances. I've always said my biggest fear in life is rejection, but really, I think it's deeper than that. I fear an un-lived life.